A cartoon of a Remain voter and a Leave voter fighting in front of a British and E.U. flag. By Oddball Times

This week I asked two Brits, one Brexiteer and one Remainer
About how they voted in the referendum, they said it was a no-brainer

Tarquin said…

“The EU is a utopia, it’s a beacon of peace
And no, I don’t care how the EU treated Greece
I voted remain because Richard Branson told me to
My golly gosh, I do love the EU

Brexit is bad, that’s what I’m told on a daily basis
And I believe every Brexiteer is a right-wing racist
Brexit will destroy Britain, that’s what The Guardian tells me
Celebrities voted remain, and celebs have compelled me

I didn’t vote to leave, it was the vote of the old
Because of them the price of quinoa will increase ten-fold
It’ll be worse if you’re under 30, young people will no longer have a chance
To study Pharmacology in Amsterdam or Oenology in France

Complete and utter destruction is what my peers are presenting
My heroes swear the problems will be constant and unrelenting
Import prices will increase, I hope those who chose leave are repenting
Brexit will cause house prices to fall (even though I’m renting)

Brexit will destroy infrastructure, we’ll have to stockpile food
The price of clothes will go up, we’ll all be walking around nude
There’ll be chaos at the hospitals, there’ll be a shortage of medication
I’m bi-polar with IBS so I’ll be in a very dire situation

There’ll be bedlam at the border, there’ll be an increase in tax
Brexit will raise the price of petrol, soon it’ll be like Mad Max
Pot-holes, unfinished buildings surrounded by piles of rotting meat
There’ll be tyre-fires, gangs of zombies, there’ll be carnage in the street”

Terry said…

“The EU is evil, it was created by the Nazis
The day that we leave we’re gonna have a load of street parties
I voted leave because Ian Botham told me to
Jesus Christ, I chuffing-well hate the EU

Brexit will fix immigration, England is overrun
That’s what I’m told when I read the Daily Mail and The Sun
If those loony-left remoaners stop Brexit I’ll kick up a fuss
I want the money that was promised on that big red bus

Brexit will kick out the Muslamics, get rid of Sharia law
It’s because of immigrants and refugees that us white folk are poor
Brexit will stop Polacks getting our jobs and that ain’t prejudiced
Jobs for us natives! (but I’m on disability benefits)

I don’t like Europe but I have a time-share in Spain
I was there in an English pub this Summer cheering on Harry Kane
Yes I’m proud to be English. C’mon Andy Murray!
And I eat proper English food like chips, kebabs and curry

So of course, I definitely want to leave the EU
I want my wife’s tan to be brown and I want my passport to be blue
I want the health tourists out of all the hospital wards
I want English companies to thrive like Pringle, Old Spice, and Ford”

…Well, it seems that regardless of how people came to their decision
Most of them were influenced by scaremongering and supposition
Politicians talk doublespeek, hyperboles, or derision
Everything they say is meant for distraction and division

So what will happen when we leave? Will it be exactly what we chose?
Will it be what the left predict or what the right presuppose?
What will happen when we leave? Well, instead of coming to blows
Lets at the very least agree that nobody really knows

And once you agree on that you’ll be in a state of complete Zen
In the grand-scheme of things and on a scale of 1 to 10
Brexit is like a 2, shit happens now and then
When haven’t we been beholden to politicians and businessmen?

20,000 years later do we care why Neanderthals and humans split?
2000 years later do we care about every Roman writ?
Well in a thousand more, nobody’s gonna care about Brexit
It’s a blip in history and I couldn’t give a fucking shit

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