This week in the Celebrity Clone Lab is TV presenter Stacey Dooley. If you don’t know, she’s the clone of actor Jane Asher!
Now you may say that Dooley isn’t a perfect copy of Asher and you’d be right. Records indicate that the Celebrity Clone Lab intended to create a perfect clone of Jane but due to renovation work, they had to relocate to a temporary lab in Luton to complete the cloning process. In this decrepit town amidst the stale aura of townsmen Charles Bronson (criminal) and Paul Young (crimes against music) the DNA unfortunately mutated.
Due to the atmosphere of nearby EasyJet headquarters, the cells of Asher became airy and orange and eventually transmuted into Dooley. Horrified by their failed clone, the scientists sent Stacey packing to the BBC to make documentaries instead of allowing her to act.
To prevent her from ever attempting to perform on celluloid like her clone progenitor, the Queen was convinced by the lab to award Stacey Dooley an MBE for “services to broadcasting”. The Celebrity Clone Lab think this may be enough to keep her away from movies as Stacey’s aggravating voice and insincere on-camera expressions may do untold damage to the fragile British film industry.
(Here’s further photographic evidence that Stacey Dooley is a lesser Jane Asher 👇🏾)