After fighting war after war against dictators and fascists, Britain now pays homage to dictatorships and fascism by forcing its citizens to wear the remembrance poppy. Brits love being pressured to don the red flower every November (and now October) as it apparently helps them remember how free they are.

The public are reminded that the poppy has nothing to do with militarism although it does look particularly good when pinned against camouflage or on the lapel of a news reader who’s letting you know which military conflict the British Army are currently engaged in.

Isn’t it great that the citizens of a free country cower to the poppy police every year? Making sure that they never leave the house or appear on television or go to the bog without their completely non-compulsory, non-obligatory, non-mandatory badge of remembrance (or the jingoist Gestapo will get ’em).