After hearing the recent news about Xmas 2020 celebrations here in the UK, you might be thinking to yourself “why is the government allowing a three-house bubble during Christmas?”. Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs and Jews didn’t get to extend their “bubble” during their festivals so what’s so special about this Christian holiday? With the Coronavirus in full infectious swing, what’s going to stop our family and extended family catching the disease now?

The answer is actually very simple: if you look closely at the COVID-19 virus under a microscope, you’ll see that it’s very festive, in fact it looks very similar to an orange and clove Pomander Ball. The government won’t officially say it, but the Coronavirus is basically a teeny-weeny Christmas bauble made of tinsel and crepe paper, and in the very centre there’s a nanoscopic Santa Claus suspended in egg nog molecules who’s thinking of the baby Jesus, so it can’t do any harm between the 23rd and 27th of December!