A movie poster for a Banksy biopic starring Timothy Spall

Greenlit: Two More Artist Biopics Starring Timothy Spall

After a couple of films in which Timothy Spall played artists J.M.W. Turner and L.S. Lowry, the question remains: will Tim play any more daubers of paint? Will he portray any more makers of assorted objet d'art? The answer is: of course he will! Spall is now set to play the mysterious graffiti artist Banksy … Continue reading Greenlit: Two More Artist Biopics Starring Timothy Spall

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Azealia Banks and William Jackson Harper inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Azealia Banks And William Jackson Harper

If you've ever thought to yourself "what happens when a clone is dropped on its head?", we have the answer! William Jackson Harper's clone Azealia Banks was dropped 212 times whist being transported from Dallas, Texas to Harlem, New York. The crucible tongs that held onto Azealia's forehead slipped multiple times due to her being … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Azealia Banks And William Jackson Harper

Roy Wood of The Move hiding behind a music stand. By Oddball Times

Behind The Lyrics: Blackberry Way By The Move

Remember the late '00s and early '10s when everybody from wannabe business moguls to budding reality stars were clutching a BlackBerry phone, BBM-ing each other like mad? Unfortunately, BlackBerry slowly began to fall out of favour, being replaced by an Apple like Ribena after the sugar tax. Not a lot of people know that the … Continue reading Behind The Lyrics: Blackberry Way By The Move

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Gemma Collins and Goldie Hawn inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Gemma Collins And Goldie Hawn

Gemma Collins is most definitely the clone of Goldie Hawn. I mean c'mon, when you take a gander at these two, it's obvious... they're so similar-looking that there can't be any other explanation! But what proof do you have we hear you ask? Well, we think it's quite telling that Gemma Collins before becoming a … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Gemma Collins And Goldie Hawn

A caricature of Boris Johnson in blue by Oddball Times

Vote Boris Johnson! Says Boris Johnson

Hello all, I'm Boris Johnson, and in this general election I ask that you disregard my past when you make your selection... I breached Commons expenses rules, I backed the Iraq War I think Tower Hamlets and Bradford want to impose sharia law I've campaigned across England, I've travelled many, many miles Looking for flag-waving … Continue reading Vote Boris Johnson! Says Boris Johnson

A cartoon of a Petri dish with John Quayle and Jack Whitehall inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Jack Whitehall And John Quayle

It's obvious that Michael Whitehall isn't Jack Whitehall's real father; a Conservative supporter in his late 40s couldn't sire a child for goodness sake! It's a well known fact that aside from their haughtiness, Conservative supporters' testes are too wizened from all their pent-up aggression. Jack therefore, did not emanate from Mike's urinary meatus, no, … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Jack Whitehall And John Quayle

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Imogen Poots and Helen Mirren inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Imogen Poots And Helen Mirren

You can't keep the truth buried for long folks! We're almost, nearly, sort of, certain that there's a Top Secret Celebrity Clone Lab somewhere in the Queen Charlotte's And Chelsea Hospital in Hammersmith, London. Why do we think that? Well, this is where two of the most famous Hammersmith celebrities were created... or as the … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Imogen Poots And Helen Mirren

Anita Ward hiding behind a music stand. By Oddball Times

Behind The Lyrics: Ring My Bell By Anita Ward

Did you know that Anita Ward's disco hit "Ring My Bell" is incorrectly titled? If you listen closely, you'll realise that this song is from the perspective of a sexually frustrated Bell Telephone Company operator. Upon receiving a call, the operator begins to flirt with her customer: “I'm glad you're home, now did you really … Continue reading Behind The Lyrics: Ring My Bell By Anita Ward

An image of MC Hammer with yellow skin and text Operation: Yellow Hammer

Operation Yellowhammer: Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em

Operation Yellowhammer, a contingency plan subtitled “Reasonable Worst Case Planning Assumptions”, has been cooked-up by the government in case of a "No Deal" Brexit. If that occurs, the folks in charge predict there'll be medication shortages, food supply problems, and protests in the streets. Operation Yellowhammer, if you didn't know, involves 90's “rapper” MC Hammer … Continue reading Operation Yellowhammer: Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Isabela Moner and Jenna Coleman inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Isabela Moner And Jenna Coleman

Blackpool-born Jenna Coleman is most famous for her work in northern soap opera Emmerdale but what many don't know is that a few years before being cast as Jasmine Thomas, her DNA was sampled and placed in some liquid nitrogen that was cleverly hidden in a jar of Coleman's Mustard. Coleman's genes were supposed to … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Isabela Moner And Jenna Coleman

A parody advertisement for Tropicana Sanguinello in the style of The Godfather movie poster. By Oddball Times

An Offer You Can’t Refuse: A Tropicana Sanguinello Advertising Idea

Francis Ford Coppola has been messing with his movies over the last decade or so, needlessly lengthening films such as Apocalypse Now and The Outsiders. Whether he's ruined his own films by re-editing them or not (and he has) the fact that he doesn't mind fiddling with his own creations surely means that my idea … Continue reading An Offer You Can’t Refuse: A Tropicana Sanguinello Advertising Idea

A billboard ad promoting Grillz by Oddball Times

All Work And No Pay Makes Jack’s Bling Dull Bwoy: A Grillz Advertising Idea

Here's my idea for an an advert promoting Grillz. “Grills” I hear you say, like George Foreman? Of course not silly, I'm referring to Grillz spelled with a "z", you know, the gold teeth that used to look cool back in the '90s but now they're corny as f... well, never mind who wears what … Continue reading All Work And No Pay Makes Jack’s Bling Dull Bwoy: A Grillz Advertising Idea

Jonas Blue and Tiesto hiding behind a music stand. By Oddball Times

Behind The Lyrics: Ritual By Tiësto, Jonas Blue And Rita Ora

The song “Ritual” isn't about a ritual at all, no, it's all about how a relationship can be paradoxically both fulfilling and demanding or rewarding and punishing. The writers chose wool to be the metaphor for love (and your lover) because it's both warming and irritating. Just listen to the chorus once more, Rita Ora … Continue reading Behind The Lyrics: Ritual By Tiësto, Jonas Blue And Rita Ora

An image of Donald Trump looking at the department of justice seal. By Oddball Times

No Justice, No Hairpiece: A Subliminal Image Of Donald Trump At The Department Of Justice

Remember when Donald Trump said he could stand on New York’s Fifth Avenue and “shoot somebody” and still not lose any voters? Unfortunately this is true. The Teflon Don can pretty much do and say whatever he wants without any repercussions. No matter how many times he lies and cheats Trump never ever faces justice, … Continue reading No Justice, No Hairpiece: A Subliminal Image Of Donald Trump At The Department Of Justice

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Sylvester Stallone and Rock Hudson inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Sylvester Stallone And Rock Hudson

Over the years, The Celebrity Clone Lab have created 26 clones of Rock Hudson, the first was code-named “Rock-A” and the last one “Rock-Z”. It was however, the 25th clone “Rock-Y” that was the most successful and he also made it as a Hollywood actor. Given his success, Rock-Y was then nicknamed “Sylvester The Clone” … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Sylvester Stallone And Rock Hudson

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Rochelle Humes and Donna Summer inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Rochelle Humes And Donna Summer

This week in the Celebrity Clone Lab is Rochelle Humes, who if you don't already know, is the clone of Donna Summer, just look at the resemblance! In 1988, Donna Summer came to the UK to make an album with Stock, Aitken, and Waterman. During the recording of Another Place In Time, Summer's DNA was … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Rochelle Humes And Donna Summer

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Peter Safran and Jeff Bezos inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Jeff Bezos And Peter Safran

Way before Amazon existed, there was a mail order store called Congo owned and operated by the Celebrity Clone Lab who were located in a classified rainforest laboratory at the time. In the Congo, there was a fantastic gene recommendation system which was developed to sort all the celeb clones and if you know where … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Jeff Bezos And Peter Safran

Elton John and Bernie Taupin hiding behind a music stand. By Oddball Times

Behind The Lyrics: Tiny Dancer By Elton John

This week in our ever-popular Behind The Lyrics segment is Elton John's song "Tiny Dancer" from his 1971 album Madman Across The Water. The '70s were of course a time for drug taking and music making and the genesis of this song isn't any different. Everybody knows that cocaine was Elton John's favourite substance back … Continue reading Behind The Lyrics: Tiny Dancer By Elton John

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Jeremy Dyson and Peter Sutcliffe the Yorkshire Ripper inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Peter Sutcliffe And Jeremy Dyson

Today in the Celebrity Clone Lab is screenwriter and writer Jeremy Dyson. If you don't know, he's the clone of serial killer Peter Sutcliffe! You simply need to look at the pair's thick, black, wavy hair to see that they are genetically linked but if you want more evidence we have it here... Before being … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Peter Sutcliffe And Jeremy Dyson

A parody billboard advertisement for Gorilla Tape. By Oddball Times

In A Sticky Situation: Gorilla Tape Advertising Idea

I've come up with another great idea for an advert! This one's for Gorilla Tape, an adhesive tape manufactured by Gorilla Glue Inc. The concept of my ad is simple; ever noticed how serial killers, rapists, kidnappers and other assorted wrongdoers always use Duck Tape to tie-up their victims? Whether it's in the news or … Continue reading In A Sticky Situation: Gorilla Tape Advertising Idea

YXNG Bane hiding behind a music stand. By Oddball Times

Behind The Lyrics: Needed Time By YXNG Bane

“Needed Time” is a very unique song by R&B singer YXNG Bane. The song, which is an ode to all things doughy, is from the perspective of a pâtissier. If you've ever baked yourself, you'll know that sometimes your cake batter can split and YXNG Bane tackles this subject without any fear. The track features … Continue reading Behind The Lyrics: Needed Time By YXNG Bane

A bottle of Yakult and some flavoured dental dams placed over the Japanese flag. By Oddball Times

Gaining Carnal Knowledge: The Art Of Seduction In Japan With The Help Of Yakult

I've always wanted to visit Japan; for the food, the sites, the technology, but more specifically the gorgeous women. Unfortunately I don't speak Japanese but after watching the idents by Yakult which air on the Food Network, I think I have all the phrases I'll require in the event of a sexual encounter (especially of … Continue reading Gaining Carnal Knowledge: The Art Of Seduction In Japan With The Help Of Yakult

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Ted Bundy and George Hebert Walker Bush inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Ted Bundy And George H. W. Bush

This week in the Celebrity Clone Lab is George H. W. Bush and Ted Bundy, just look at the uncanny resemblance! The interesting thing about this pair is that one was programmed to go into politics and the other was supposed to become a mass murderer. Unfortunately, even as a Republican, Ted Bundy failed to … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Ted Bundy And George H. W. Bush

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Ice-T and Peter Dinklage inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Ice-T And Peter Dinklage

This week in the Celebrity Clone Lab is actor Peter Hayden Dinklage, who if you don't know, is the clone of rapper Tracy Lauren Marrow (aka Ice-T) just look at the resemblance! Before living in Crenshaw, Los Angeles, Ice-T was born and raised in New Jersey and that's where a swab of his DNA was … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Ice-T And Peter Dinklage

A cartoon of a Christmas tree felling. By Oddball Times

My Annual Tree: A Christmas Tradition

I am lucky enough to have a substantial garden inherited from my first wife Audrey. This allows me to choose my desired tree from within my own property. I use my newly-acquired 500W Scorpion Handsaw to chop down the magnificent tree. I then tie the branches with 4mm strong utility nylon rope to make sure … Continue reading My Annual Tree: A Christmas Tradition

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Paul O'Grady and Tim Cook inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Tim Cook And Paul O’Grady

I'm sure you'll agree that there's little to no originality at Apple since Steve Jobs passed in 2011. There's no more innovation, no more creativity, no more design risks being taken, in fact it's plain to everybody that Apple has lost its mojo. This may have something to do with the company's CEO Tim Cook … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Tim Cook And Paul O’Grady

Kodak Black hiding behind a music stand. By Oddball Times

Behind The Lyrics: ZEZE By Kodak Black

In Kodak Black's latest track featuring Travis Scott and Offset, he reveals that he enjoys comic books, that he's had sex with comedian and presenter Stephen Fry, that he's a fan of comedian Peter Kay, plus he watches Indian satellite channels and he may even be Jewish! (at least that's we think he's saying). But … Continue reading Behind The Lyrics: ZEZE By Kodak Black

A cartoon of a Petri dish with Colin Powell and Lewis Black inside. By Oddball Times

Celebrity Clone Lab: Colin Powell And Lewis Black

This week in the Celebrity Clone Lab is comedian Lewis Black. If you don't know, he's the clone of retired four-star general and ex-secretary of state Colin Powell! Colin Powell, if you don't remember, was the bloke who gave that remarkable presentation to the U.N. in 2003. Colin was confident that Iraq had weapons of … Continue reading Celebrity Clone Lab: Colin Powell And Lewis Black