A cartoon of a Christmas tree felling. By Oddball Times

My Annual Tree: A Christmas Tradition

I am lucky enough to have a substantial garden inherited from my first wife Audrey. This allows me to choose my desired tree from within my own property. I use my newly-acquired 500W Scorpion Handsaw to chop down the magnificent tree. I then tie the branches with 4mm strong utility nylon rope to make sure I have enough purchase on the tree to move it … Continue reading My Annual Tree: A Christmas Tradition

A parody of the Build-A-Bear Workshop logo with masonic symbolism. By Oddball Times

If You Go Down In The Woods Today: En Route To The Bilderberg Group

What the masonic hell is going on?! I made all the necessary preparations to infiltrate this year’s Bilderberg Group Meeting, I took my camera, my placard saying “I’m with Alex Jones“ (I was planning on getting her autograph later, love The One Show on the BBC), I also took some sandwiches and a flask of tea. It took me bloodlines-forever to find the place although … Continue reading If You Go Down In The Woods Today: En Route To The Bilderberg Group

A cartoon picture of HAL from 2001, WOPR from WarGames, and an Amazon Echo referencing the Cleese, Barker, and Corbett Class Sketch. By Oddball Times

Smart Speakers: I Know My Place

Everyone seems to own a smart speaker these days. I own an Amazon Echo and a Google Home. Today I asked “Google, who would win in a fight between Proteus IV, HAL 9000, WOPR, Skynet, Colossus, and the human race?” …the damn thing didn’t respond. I then moved over to the Echo and said “Alexa, play Demon Seed and tell me the dictionary definition of irony”. Continue reading Smart Speakers: I Know My Place

A cartoon of a chinook bringing emergency aid to the Hollywood hills. By Oddball Times

Bill Gates: Control, Alt, Delete

Hey Bill, I have a brilliant idea and I’m sure you’ll be thrilled to hear it. I listened avidly to your speeches supporting eugenics and global depopulation. Firstly I had to look up the word “Philanthropic” because I thought it meant something quite different. You say the world is growing in population and your vaccines and sterilisation programs could really depopulate those who, as you … Continue reading Bill Gates: Control, Alt, Delete